Memoirs of A Villain: Louise Belcher!

Listen, I’m not a villain but I do have quite an impressive history of mischief! louise3  Before you pass any judgement, “Just remember that we are going to come out of this deal stinking rich!” The memoir deal that is!

Have you seen all of the crap that’s being marketed as “New York Times Bestsellers?” Most of the books on that list are self help mambo jumbo that even I could write up! So I will!

I’m a simple Belcher. My family owns a restaurant and are always coming across trouble or precarious situations. Who would think that this amount of excitement would be available at a burger joint? I’m an entrepreneur, I try and get in on the ground floor of every get rich quick scheme and after reading the memoirs of 2 famous villains; The Joker and Sesshomaru, I know it’s my turn to shine!

Let’s start from the beginning. Tina was crying over the latest fight between our father and her crush’s father, Jimmy Pesto! Jimmy runs the Italian place directly across the street form us and he has been terrorizing my father for as long as I can remember. Our place may not be the fanciest, but the food outweighs Pesto’s by a ton. This time, he went too far and banned Jimmy Jr, Ollie and Andy from talking to use Belchers. Tina was devastated and I’d had enough. It’s time to protect the family.

I’ve devised a few plans to stick it to Jimmy one and for all.

Plan #1 – I feed my brother Gene buckets of chili and send him over into Jimmy Pesto’s restroom. Unknowingly, I’ve placed cherry bombs in Gene’s back pocket. He’s sure to drop a few in the toilet as he relieves himself and then KABOOM! Gene cause a minor explosion while he is pooping and the smell causes everyone to evacuate the restaurant!

Nope, can’t do that Louise. Gene will be left behind and Jimmy will somehow blame dad.

Plan #2 – I get Andy and Ollie to let me into their father’s kitchen by telling them that we’re going to play a game of hide n seek.  louise2  I volunteer to be “IT” and let the twins go off and hide away from the crime scene. Then I find Jimmy’s special marinara sauce and stir in a very special ingredient that Zeke secured for me. He beat up the science club and made them concoct a tasteless liquid that causes diarrhea. One taste of this stuff and the entire restaurant will be sick! Those who didn’t have the marinara will be sick watching others throw up and poop their pants. It’s full proof.

“Hey Louise, Rudy is here” – Tina interrupts bursting into my room.

“Hi Louise!” Rudy waves with his free arm.

“Ughhh I’m trying to make us millions here guys. What is it?” I answer slamming my pen on the desk.

“Well I wanted to show you my new Roach Farm.” Rudy says. He walks over to the desk and places a container down.

“I want to see, I want to see” Gene screams running into the room.

We all gather around as Rudy takes off the sheet covering his new friends. In aw we all marvel at the roaches walking around.

“Aw, Rudy they look sad.” Tina says

“Yea, can’t you let them loose so that they can breathe?” Gene agrees.

I smile am evil grin as the belcher children and Rudy continue to play with the roaches. Clasping my hands I let out a maniacal laugh. “This is perfect! Bwahahahaha, bwahahaha.” louise1

Tina Joins in “Aha, aha hahaha” followed by Rudy “Hahahaha.”

“I want to feel included” Gene yells “ahahahahhaha.”

The next day…

We’re sitting in the restaurant and Tina is telling us for the Gazillioneth  time that she wants to run away if she can’t be with Jimmy Jr. Dad is trying to calm her down and mom is singing her a lullaby to ease her mind. Just then we hear screams from across the street. The family runs to window to see all of Jimmy Pesto’s customers running into the streets with little critters following them.

“Omg Lyn, do you see this?” Dad says.

“Let me see, let me see. Oh My Gosh, Bobby!” Mom replies.

“What’s going on dad?” Gene and Tina ask.

“It’s the best day of our lives kids. Jimmy Pesto’s has been infested with roaches and now everyone will know!” Dad yells.

It’s the first time I think I’ve ever seen my dad cry. Tears of joy roll down his face as the Health Department and the News crews pulled up in front of Jimmy’s. Everyone rushes outside to watch the descent of Father’s enemy, except me. I stand with my arms crossed and the smile of satisfaction on my face.

See, I’m not a villain, I am a simple daughter trying to save her family from ruin. I am Louise Belcher!

 

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Six Word Story Challenge: Poem

Happy Sunday Novas! I’ve found another blogging challenge and this one is for the 6 word stories! Here is my entry into this week’s post!

Her fire ignited his crimson spell.

Feel free to join the challenge over at the Sometime’s Steller Storyteller blog by clicking here. 

This post will be a short poem on the 6 word story that I have submitted.

Ember’s breathe, a volcanic eruption,

Brought on by his dark seduction,

Wildly flying to escape his gaze,

Knowing not his trap, his maze,

Trying her best not to consume,

The tempting lust in the room,

He cornered her before she could strike,

And tamed her beast before the night,

Merlin cast his spell so well,

It iced and smothered her mood to kill,

Blinding lights she could not see,

The reality of this fantasy,

Merlin loved the beast so wild,

Reluctant as though she were a child,

Ember found a way to love him back,

Saving her from her devious acts,

Now they fly hand in hand

The dragon and her magical man.

Have a great day!

-Luna 🙂

 

Credits:

pinterest.com

 

 

Dark Blood Book Review!

Hiya Novas! Today I will review my 2nd book on the blog called Dark Blood by Christine Feehan. The first review was a Thriller called “Concealed in Death.” You can read my first book review by clicking here. I actually started reading this book because I wanted to get a sense on the Fantasy style of writing. This book gave me great insight and tips to carry on over. On to the Dark Blood review!

Title: Dark Blood

Published: September 2, 2014

Author: Christine Feehan

Genre: Fantasy

Series: Dark Series #26

Dark Blood is a Fantasy book that follows the journey of an elite hunter known as Zev. This is my first proper fantasy novel so I wasn’t quite sure on what to expect, but I was pleasantly surprised by the outcome. In a world filled with different species hiding amongst humans, you can never know who to trust. Zev is an elite hunter and alpha Lycan who’s main job is to protect the Lycan council and follow their ever wish. Zev is one of the best, he’s extremely fast, intelligent and one of the top hunters in the land. When he is injured in battle, Zev learns something about his lineage that will change his world forever; he’s Dark Blood. But what does that mean? How can Zev use this information to help stop a brewing war between the Lycans and Carpathians? That’s what he and his group of close knit friends intend to find out!

The setting takes place in the  forests and caves of a distant land. I know that they cross through Russia and real life locations. I really liked the pace and the tone on the novel. You are reading mostly from Zev and his lifemate Branislava’s point of view. db1

I really love the characters and the author did a fantastic job positioning Zev in the story. He is my favorite character and I’m not usually one to gush over a main character. Zev is the true definition of “Alpha” in every sense of the word. The action was fantastic and appeared in mage battles, physical battles and primal fighting between rogue packs. The antagonist is n revealed until about half way through, but it’s worth the wiat. The build-up and anticipation between what’s going to happen next had me eager to turn the page. There are many suggestive and descriptive adult scenes so it is not recommended for kids under 17.  I’m definitely going to read some more books in the “Dark Series.”

Thank you for reading my quick thoughts on finishing Dark Blood! What are you curently reading? Have you read any books in the Dark Series? Let’s talk books!

-Luna 🙂

Dark Blood (Book): First Impressions

Happy Wednesday! I have been reading the book Dark Blood and I’m about half way done. I’ve decided to do a quick first impressions post on what I have read so far and what I expect towards the end of the book.

Dark Blood is book #26 out of a series of 31books in the “Dark” series written by Christine Feehan. This book follows the story of the hunter Zev who is a hunter and Lycan. Zev finds himself in a strange place with a beautiful woman within reach of him. Not knowing what has happened or how he came to be in this place, Zev knows that he is injured and dying. What is going on? Who is this mysterious woman? And why has the “Ancients” spoke to Zev in a language he couldn’t understand before. Why did they refer to his bloodline as “Dark Blood?”

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Currently I’m about a quarter of the way through the book and  I love it so far. I wanted to start reading a fantasy book to gain a better understanding of the fantasy world. Currently I am writing a fantasy story myself so the more I read, the better I am able to write my story. At least that’s what I’ve read lol. So far the scene has been set, the characters (at least the protagonists) have been established, the conflict has been revealed (although I feel as though there’s more on the way) and the glimpse of romance, intrigue and magic has been hinted at. I’m really enjoying the story so far and every chance I get, I continue reading.

I expect to uncover more answers about what the main conflict of the book is. Currently, the characters have awaken Zev because they believe he is the only answer to stopping a full out war between the Lycans and Carpathians. Zev is badly injured and on the brink of releasing his inner wolf, someone needs to provide him with answers or there will be heck to pay! I expect to find out what happened to Zev’s family and what the true meaning of the term “Dark Blood” is. It has been mentioned twice so far, once by the ancients and once by Zev questioning his allies. Both times Zev has walked away with more questions then answers and a room full of people staring at him. I’m expecting there to be a huge battle, even though Zev is supposed to bring peace. I am expecting to find out more about the healing and magical abilities of members of his brotherhood.

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So far I am really enjoying this book and can’t wait to finish it. I think I will write one more impression post when I’m farther along and culminate this series with the final book review. Thank you for reading my first impressions, have a great Wednesday!

 

-Luna 🙂